Well, I have a new beverage addiction: infused water. I know, I know, I’m a little late on the infused water bandwagon. I always thought plain water was just fine by me; being a potable purist, I scoffed at the notion of needing anything other than simple H2O to dress up my water… until a TRX pal let me sample this lush libation, this rejuvenating refreshment, this sweet nectar of the fruit Gods. I should have known this combination would be Kryptonite for me: fruit and water? Basically all Nika needs to live? Sold. So, bored one day at work, I was browsing Target’s website for some new sulfate and fatty alcohol-free shampoo, conditioner, and body wash (more on this later… better for both your hair and your skin). Being a stubborn Taurus, I scoff at the notion of paying for shipping on online purchases. I am such a bull-headed brat on this issue that I will buy miscellaneous items that I don’t really need (but want haz) to reach the minimum for free shipping. Enter the $19.99 Fruit Infusion Pitcher à la Target.
Bonjour mon ami, enchanté. Enchanted, indeed, was I with this little device. As soon as my Target box arrived on my doorstep, I did my happy package dance. Don’t you miss getting real mail? Sure, emails, texts, Facebook messages are just fine and dandy, but don’t you miss coming home to letters in your mailbox? Handwritten mementos? Picturesque postcards? I surely do. But, alas, the only thing I come home to is oodles of junk mail, bills, and the occasional J.Crew catalogue. Therefore, I have learned to love online shopping; it’s quite a cathartic and delightful experience. First, you get to online browse, which is honestly the most entertaining part of the whole process. I’m a nerd, so I love researching everything that I buy. Reading reviews, comparing prices, comparing items, reading ingredients… I do it all. Then, I create a joyous yet completely irresponsible and irrational wish list of MUST HAZ ALL THE THINGS. Then I take a glance at the total, throw up in my mouth a little, and begin to delete all the shit that can live without. But honestly, often the most fun part of online shopping is just toying with the thought of having all these things. Do I really need 3 new facial moisturizers? No, but I like the idea of getting to try them all. Do I really ice pop molds? Actually, maybe, but I’ll hold off on these. Do I really need two new pairs of shoes? …(crickets)… Nika? ….. Nika, really? Shhhh… Do you even have any more room on your shoe rack? No… but I can make room… So your actually going to get rid of some shoes? Well, maybe… No… but I can put them on the floor! And start a new rack! Mm, yeah, I highly doubt you even have room on the floor, considering this is what your closet looked like FIVE MONTHS AGO and I know you’ve collected another handful of new additions since then. Sadly, this isn’t even all of them…
Shhh, rational part of my brain. Just think of My Precious….
Okay, well maybe I’m hopeless when it comes to shoes, but I digress. Then, after you finally decide on this Christmas list of items, you get to anxiously await Santa’s arrival on your doorstep. This equates to me obsessively tracking my package down to the minute, refreshing incessantly until that joyous “Delivered” checkmark appears next to my tracking number. Next, I rush home (after going to the gym, of course) to yank open my front door to gaze upon that glorious cardboard present courtesy of moi. Inevitably, I spend the remainder of the evening either staring lovingly at my new purchases, trying them on, using them, wearing them, eating them… whatever the case may be.
Regardless of the circumstances, I received my infusion pitcher the other night, hastily ripped it from its cardboard confines, and began concocting fruity combinations to create. After being out of town for the better part of a week, my fresh fruit supply wasn’t as abundant as usual, but I was still able to gather a mango, some strawberries, and part of a lime to use in my infusion pitcher. I cut all the fruit up, placed it into the center container, and filled the pitcher with fresh water. I let this amalgamation of fruity flavors chill and infuse overnight in my refrigerator until the water took on a reddish orange tint, as pictured above.
The result? Delicious. All the fancy fruit flavor of store-bought flavored water without all the added sugar and weirdo ingredients and preservatives. In essence, my new obsession. Fruit and water? Well, that’s a much healthier obsession than my footwear fetish.